This type of spice is all about using the 5-senses to create a sexy atmosphere and mood and then tuning into the senses once the party gets started. You might be feeling like your sex life is in a rut if you aren’t engaging most of your senses or if you need to engage them in new ways. 

Try using different textures like silk, feathers, faux fur, or even a wartenburg pinwheel to wake up your senses in a new way. Experiment with temperature using ice or hot wax–just find a candle that melts at a lower temp to make sure the wax isn’t TOO hot! This type may also love playing with sensory deprivation like blindfolds. Need to get your aural enjoyment on? Try setting the scene with music, tuning into your partner’s groans or practicing your dirty talk.

Sensual Spices can also enjoy a visual display from their partner. Try putting on something sexy for your partner. Lace, nylons, latex or leather can add not only a visual component, but a textural one. And what about taste? You may just want to make sure you have minty breath . . . or you can feed each other chocolate covered strawberries or lick whipped cream off your partner’s body! Get creative with these–this is just the tip of the iceberg!

Want More Juicy Tips?

There are some ingredients that tend to make sex fulfilling for most of us that don’t include toys or tangibles! If you crave closeness with your partner remember the simple things…

Presence – We all love feeling that someone is truly WITH us. Not distracted. Not thinking about someone else. Not just trying to hurry up and get to the orgasm at the end. And not trying to hurry up and get to our orgasm even. Just present with a sense of curiosity and no agenda. You could also think of this as mindfulness when it comes to sex.

And the thing is, we can’t control anyone but ourselves, so practice bringing this presence to your next sex session with a partner. One relatively easy way we can do this is by tuning into our breath and our 5 senses. When your mind wanders to what’s for dinner or your infinite “to-do” list, bring it back to the feel, the sounds, the temperature, the texture, and the sensations you’re experiencing.

Try taking a deep breath and letting go. And you may want to clue your partner in ahead of time that you’re going to be trying something a little different–they may want to join you! 

Communication – While words can be limiting, talking about sex is generally helpful for knowing what your partner is into and expressing what you’re into as well. Because we haven’t been taught to talk about sex and prioritize pleasure, most of us aren’t used to this. If this is something you could use some work on, I’d encourage you to have a meta-conversation with your partner.

Ask them if they’d like to receive feedback and how. And tell them the same in return. I wouldn’t recommend having a full-scale post-mortem right after sex, but little bits of feedback during an encounter or a discussion when you’re calm and fully clothed can go a long way towards getting you on the same page, helping you feel truly understood by your partner and getting to know what lights them up sexually as well.

Want More Help?

Want some help applying all this spicy info to your own personal life? Whether you’re dating or partnered up or ethically non-monogamous, I can help! Book your $1 consultation with me!

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