038 Authenticity, People Pleasing & True Intimacy!

Description of the episode

We all want connection, but sometimes our defense mechanisms—or “parts”—get in the way. Some of the most common culprits are the People Pleaser Part and the Obligated Part. We may think there’s no other way than to do things we don’t actually want to do and to put others’ needs first at our own expense, but there absolutely is. In fact, tamping down our authentic self guarantees we won’t experience true intimacy in our relationships. After all, how can you feel fully known or understood if you’re not really showing up? So, while our “parts” have the best intentions, they’re unfortunately misguided. This is where Internal Family Systems and Self Energy comes in! Self Energy is our higher consciousness and already feels connected to everyone and everything. From that place we can heal the People Pleaser and Obligated parts and experience real closeness with others.

In This Episode, You’ll Learn:

– How defense mechanisms or “parts” may show up in your relationships

– How people pleasing can sneak up on you even if you’re an assertive person who isn’t afraid to speak up

– How accessing Self Energy can easily help you heal parts that aren’t serving you and bring you closer to the people who are ready to love you for exactly who you are


  • 01:46Let's dive in to Authenticity!
  • 04:55 How we all want to be seen and accepted.
  • 08:30 What part in me do I feel needed?
  • 17:38 Learning more about parts and how to work with them.
  • 20:36 How to know if your partner is ready for sex?
  • 22:48 How can you be more open to connecting?